Do we not all wish to be remembered for some positives when we are gone? Something more than having been born, lived and died without having made an imprint, no matter how small on the world or at least on those we love and care for? Essentially to have made a difference and left leaving ‘our’ world a better place.

We can’t all go down as saviours, great inventors or politicians having changed the lives of huge populations with our vaccines, internet or equal rights legislation but we can leave a warm positive glow in the hearts of those we leave behind if we live the way we wish to be remembered and maybe, just maybe we will help others live their lives in a happier and more contented manner.

To be remembered for more than our social media legacy (which would seem to be there ‘living’ for eternity like it or not!) we MAY wish to formally pass on our knowledge and wisdom, thoughts and ideas, things that have worked for us and those that didn’t. Some will write or record in some way a Personal Legacy Statement. It is a declaration of how you would like your life to have impacted others from an ethical or moral standpoint or even just what we learned that works.

…never go to sleep on an argument… Would you rather be right or happy?

Maybe it’s best to ‘publish’ and let things be known before we depart and of course those closest to us may well have been made aware of some or all of our ideas, concerns and expectations. We are none of us perfect and will get things wrong along the way, however our legacy will depend on not only how we were perceived by others but how we lived according to our beliefs etc.

There may well be a mismatch and tough love etc. is often misconstrued and favouritism may well be anything but and in fact true kindness to one in greater need. We all need to be not only loved but to be told so. Children crave to be seen, heard and validated by their parents and need to know we are proud of them, more than a  

it has to be in their language but coming from your heart in a way that rings true. I came across two phrases in my family where awkwardness likely hid true feelings.

On her wedding day her father said “…you look nice…” – It was by all accounts the best thing he ever said to her…but I’m sure there was more beneath? 

Do you love me? You never say you do. 

Of course I do! I’m here aren’t I?

Without the bigger picture our legacy may not be a true reflection of who we were deep down. I’ve written on Death, Bereavement and Inheritance – all rather too late if we haven’t thought and planned beforehand and who knows when the Grim Reaper will come calling and deny us the chance to put things right or explain?